Y’know . . . it’s one thing to recognize and say out loud, “I have $MENTAL_ILLNESS and/or $PSYCHOLOGICAL_TRAUMA.”
But if you don’t do something about it (i.e. get help for it, in whatever manner you’re able to), what good does that do? You can know yourself inside and out, but if you don’t use that knowledge to actually improve your lot, what the hell does it even matter?
Especially if you’ve known these things about yourself for years, especially if you’ve known for years that these things fuck up your life and relationships . . . if, after all that self-knowledge, you’re still not taking real responsibility for it by fixing it, I don’t care what you say or what it took to even recognize that you have these problems in the first place; you’re still acting like a goddamned coward. Know why? Because actively working on these problems is work. It’s harder than you can believe unless you’ve been there, dark and painful and bloody and hellish. You feel like you’re lost in a dark wood at night while you’re doing it, and people who find themselves in that wood don’t always make it out alive.
Start doing that, and then come talk to me about how you’re totally owning your problems for real this time. Until you actually begin that work, don’t fool yourself into believing that you’re doing something about them, because you haven’t even begun.